Here are 3 ways to procrastinate:
Number One: When you have something you need to do, first think about another thing you could do, and feel if you’d rather do that. If not, then think about another thing. And another thing until you feel like you have to do something else.
Number Two: When you have something you need to do that is challenging, say to yourself “Who are you to do that?” You aren’t good enough. You don’t know enough.
Number Three: When you have something you need to do, pull out TikTok.
Now why in the world do you want to procrastinate? Stick around and I’ll tell you how to use these strategies in a positive way.
Here are a few of DFL maxims:
- The person with the most behavioral flexibility controls the interaction.
- Given multiple options or resources in a particular situation, you will pick the one that is best for you.
- If you have only one behavior option or resource, you will use it even if it is a bad choice.
- When you run out of choices, you will freeze and your mind will go blank.
I was chillingly reminded of these maxims when watching the Netflix Jeffrey Epstein documentary. Listening to those young girls talk about their experiences, and how they would realize they should stop doing what he was asking.
That it was more than they’d agreed to and it was wrong. But they just froze and kept doing something they wanted to stop. It is easy to say, “Oh I’d cuss the guy out and leave.” Or we might empathize and say when you are afraid you keep doing something in order not to get hurt.
Both of those are possibilities. But I remember one of the experts on abuse saying they were 14-year old girls and they just didn’t know what to do.
That clicked with me because I understood what happens when I only know one thing to do. I’m likely to just keep doing that thing, even if I don’t want to because it is the only thing I know.
You hear us say it when explaining how we didn’t act in a bad situation, “I didn’t know what to do.”
It is true in less major things as well. When we don’t know what to say on that sales call. We just freeze.
The pretty redhead at the bar makes an unexpected answer to our question and our brain just goes blank.
Or when we starting thinking about all the things we could be doing, instead of the thing we should be doing. We don’t know another option so we procrastinate.
Strategies are those options.
Strategies are processes that get an outcome. They are generally neither good nor bad in and of themselves. Rather the outcome is good or bad.
I mentioned last week that we need to learn new strategies so we can have more choices.
Let me ask you, are there things that you keep doing you don’t want to do? Maybe it is buying candy bars in the check out line while on a diet. Or spending money on shoes you don’t need.
What if you applied the same strategy to that action you learned from procrastination. Look at the candy bar and think, “What would I rather buy?”
Next thing you think about not good enough? Try another.
And another.
Until you find something you want more.
Or the line moves up and you’ve procrastinated on that decision too long.
Remember strategies can be internal or external.
If you have problems with the candy checkout lines, pull Tik Tok out while you are waiting.
Let your mind know that you have more options.
Applying strategies you already know is just one way to learn a new strategy. Another is to ask other people what they do.
I was teaching some of this material to a mastermind group and I got the Tik Tok example when I asked, “What is an external strategy for procreation?” One of the people in the group immediately suggested this one.
Others included:
- Filling your schedule so you don’t have any time to do what you should.
- Forgetting, or not even remember to do the thing.
- Related to not having a strategy for getting important, but not urgent things done.
- Cleaning house.
We all have strategies for procrastination. What’s yours?
Question of the Day: What is your strategy for procrastinating?
Leave an answer in the comments and also talk about how it can be used for a positive outcome.
